BITCH PLANET #1

What a fucking title, right? So there's that. But there are a few reasons I was really looking forward to this. One: it was supposed to be like a Grindhouse movie. I like that stuff. Two: it's chicks in prison! C'mon, that sounds cool. Three: the prison is on another planet, which made it sound like a wild, Escape from New York sort of thing but in space. Four: I have a story idea about sorority girls stranded on a desert island and this sounded similar so I was curious about the execution. So the elements were there. But this book is just not any good. There are several reasons. One: it's not wild, crazy, or Grindhouse enough. Two: it takes place on another planet but they never even show space or the planet so that part is pretty pointless. Three: the art by Valentino De Landro is too plain. Four: the script by Kelly Sue DeConnick is weak, with an entire surprise twist that is just confusing and un-interesting. Really, the premise is great. But, alas, it's a let-down. *1/2
(out of ****)

SUPERMAN #35

It was kind of a big deal that John Romita, Jr. went to DC. He'd been with Marvel forever (I first became a fan when he was drawing Punisher War Zone way back when). So DC went full hog, paired him with their biggest writer, Geoff Johns, on their second biggest hero, Superman, and voila! Big time! The problem is that there has never been a good Superman book like ever and that this one isn't really any different. Unlike a ton of online commentators, I really like JRR's bulky, bigger than life characters and his work. I suppose because it's unique while still being classic. This isn't his best work, however. And the story, about Superman meeting a new test-tube baby/super guy from another dimension, isn't all that interesting. This is the fourth issue of the current run with JRR & Johns and probably the worst. It's not awful. It's entertaining, light, easy on the eyes. But it's not compelling. It doesn't really make you care too much about anyone. I will say that Johns is often a long term creator and maybe all of this is just building up to a grand scheme of awesomeness. But, really, no one seems to be capable of writing a great Superman book. Dude's like kryptonite to writer's or something. Someday maybe we'll see an epic, awesome, earth-shattering run. I've been reading Superman books off and on for twenty-five years and still waiting. ** (out of ****)

WYTCHES #1

If you have to misspell a word in the title of your book then it probably means you need a new (original) idea. But I suppose if you wanted to see anyone's take on witches in comicbookdom it'd be Scott Snyder's. With that said, this book is a bit of a disappointment but still a much more engrossing read than most books out there. Jock's art unfortunately doesn't work that well here and, honestly, Snyder could've just called his "witches" something else because they're not really like what we've seen before. The premise is that a teenage girl is bullied and wishes her bully would disappear. She does! A few witches pull her into a tree and she's gone and it fucks up this teenage girl's life. The witches here are all clawed-arms and, apparently, bigger than humans (it doesn't help that Snyder's afterward gives more of the plot/premise away than the actual book). You can "pledge" another human to these witches and in return get whatever you want. So the story is kind of like sell-your-soul-to-Satan. A good read with a few rough edges. *** (out of ****)

THE FADE OUT #1

The opening to this book is awesome (and what a stellar first line: "Charlie still thought about The Phantom Planes sometimes"). And just like that, you know you're in Brubaker/Phillips territory. Their last book, a mash-up of demonic cults and film noir, Fatale, just ended in July, so it's not like we were all waiting with baited breath or anything for a new dose of their hard-boiled gut-punches. This new book is similar to all of their others, which might be a shame if their typical stuff wasn't any good. It's post-WW2 Hollywood, and the 50's brings us an alcoholic screenwriter who happens to get mixed up in a murder cover-up by the studios. The main character, Charlie Parish, is almost too much like most of the other main characters Brubaker and Phillips have cooked up...but that's the only bad thing I can say about this book. It's super entertaining, engrossing, brutal, and has terrific art by Sean Phillips as usual. And the Hollywood locale will no doubt add some interesting characters and scenarios to the mix. It's same-old, sure, but a knock-out nonetheless. ***1/2 (out of ****)

OUTCAST #1

Robert Kirkman, the king of comics and TV these days, is back with a new original series. That's kinda sorta a big deal. If that wasn't enough, the book is $2.99 for 44 pages. A fucking steal! Batman #32, also out today, is $3.99 for 19 pages of art. So you can see why a lot of people look down at the big two publishers. Anyway, Kirkman's latest, drawn in spare, subtle detail by the impressive Paul Azaceta, is basically an exorcist story. The main character, Kyle, previously had to deal with his mother and wife being possessed by a demon. Now he's pulled back into the fray by a preacher friend who needs help exorcising a demon out of a boy. The catch? Why are all these demon attacks happened around Kyle? What's so special about him? I guess we'll find out...but it wouldn't surprise me if this turns into a heaven vs. hell type showdown with Kyle being the savior. That's a cliche, right? And that's the problem with the book. Kirkman, obviously, made his bones with two books that are pretty far from being original: a zombie book and a super-hero book. He has, to his credit, made them entertaining, wild, and fun. So far this book, Outcast, isn't "fun," but it is fairly compelling (and, unfortunately, it's not scary or creepy at all). We'll have to see where he goes from here, but so far it's kind of average. **1/2

QUANTUM & WOODY #11

I guess Valiant, even back in the day, thought one hilarious
buddy super-hero book wasn't enough (the first being,
obviously, Archer & Armstrong). I started reading this new series but then stopped for unknown reasons and now I'm back. This book is very, very funny. The writer, James Amus, is terrific at the "quip" and also at Austin Powers style
dumb/funny villain dialogue. The plot featuring clones,
scientists, and love, isn't all that interesting but it's a hell of a
fun book. The art is okay. Wilfredo Torres penciled the
majority of the book but for some unknown reason the last
three pages are horribly drawn by someone else. This book,
faults and all, entertained me. *** (out of ****)

ORIGINAL SIN #1 + SOUTHERN BASTARDS #1

Writer Jason Aaron had two big profile releases in consecutive weeks. If you're like me and a big fan of his, that's a good thing. The first out of the gate was Southern Bastards #1, an Image book and Aaron's first outside of Marvel since Scalped ended two years ago. This new book is a rip-off of the movie Walking Tall. A guy goes back home to a small, southern town to clean up his dead father's house. The catch? The town is run by a kingpin thug and the main character's father died fighting them with his infamous club. So now the son will inevitably do the same and fight. Not a terrible premise, albeit super unoriginal. The book opens with a dog taking a shit. I guess Aaron couldn't write a scene like that in a Marvel book so he was dying to for years. The art is sloppy and herky-jerky in a lurid style by Jason Latour. It screams indie. Not a bad start, though. It's compelling. Original Sin #1 (of 8) is not. It's this year's big Marvel event. The Watcher is killed and Captain America and Wolverine and Thor and the usual gang have to solve the mystery. The Watcher knew everything...so I'm assuming everyone's sins will be revealed. The art by Mike Deodato is mediocre, and the coloring (by Frank Martin) and inking by Deodato are way too dark. I thought I was reading it in a cave. Big event books usually suck (remember last year's bore Infinity?), although DC's current Forever Evil is super fun. Original Sin so far is just dull.
Oh, well.  
Southern Bastards #1 *** Original Sin #1 *1/2

THE SUPERIOR SPIDER-MAN #31

This is the last issue of this book, the infamous book where Dr. Octopus took over Peter Parker's mind. It lasted thirty-one issues in a little over a year. I can't say that I loathed the book, especially since I read every issue, but the potential for a superior series was there and it sadly ended up being a good not great book. The major problem was that I thought it would be a typical evil-takes-over cliche, like an evil twin tale. Doc Ock as Parker would be villanious, sleep around, create mayhem, entertain the fuck out of us. No. Doc Ock as Peter went back to college, started a company, dated a girl, fought some villains. Eh. It wasn't that different, which is why it was ultimately not as great a book as it could have been. It was the same-old-thing with a slight twist when what we all wanted was a major twist. In this issue, the finale of "Goblin War," the Green Goblin gets unmasked, Parker, now back as his old self, saves the day. Even the girl lives. Yawn. Giuseppe Camuncoli does wondrous work on art but even Dan Slott took a vacation day and only wrote the plot (Christos Gage wrote the script). As much as I like Slott, I wonder what some other Marvel writers would do with Spider-Man. Namely...Jason Aaron. It's sad that Marvel only really has one Spider-Man book (they used to have Web of and Spider-Man and Spectacular). DC has a ton of Batman books. If you don't like, say, Detective, then go read one of the others. If you don't like what Slott and co. are doing then you're screwed. And with the end of this experiment comes a new The Amazing Spider-Man #1 in two weeks with the same creative team. It'll be more of the same. And that's not a bad thing. After all, I'd be happy if Parker was still taking pictures at the Bugle and with MJ. ** (out of ****)

NEW #1's

 DAREDEVIL #1: The same creative team a month later on the same book. What's the difference? Marvel may try to tell you that the location is different so it's new and bold and more exciting! No, the difference is the same exact book is $3.99 instead of $2.99. It's twenty-pages (what? no bonus pages for the premiere?). I will admit that this issue is a lot better than the last arc that featured the dull Serpent organization. The final page is a strange cliffhanger of sorts. Matt Murdock is now in San Francisco. The book looks great (Chris Samnee on art). I miss the dark days of Daredevil, though. **1/2

 AMERICAN VAMPIRE: SECOND CYCLE #1: Writer Scott Snyder promises that there will not be a third cycle in the afterward, so if you're a fan of this title, enjoy it while it lasts. I remember years ago when I bought the first issue and the clerk mentioned that he couldn't wait to read it since it was Stephen King's first comic book that he's written (he wrote half of it, Snyder wrote the other half). I was letdown, not sure about the clerk, but this book was a little too silly and too dull to interest me. During it's run I would read ecstatic reviews and think I was missing out and then read an issue (Pacific battles during WWII but with vampires! A James Dean-esque vamp hunter in the 1950's!) or two and realize that it just wasn't all that great and I was indeed not missing out. This issue, set in the 1960's U.S. and Mexico, is good but as usual nothing special nor exceptional. The art, by Rafael Albuquerque, is better than the story. We have Pearl, the female vamp, on a farm in the midwest that's a sort of orphanage for vampires. Meanwhile, Skinner Sweet ends up running into the new big bad, The Gray Trader (dumb name), who whips people up into the sky in a tornado (or something). I still don't know why people rave about this.  **1/2

 STARLIGHT #1: Mark Millar is back with a new book about an old, ex-superhero that is grieving his dead wife and living the dull, regular life of a senior citizen. The catch is that he was magically transported one night to a far away planet and ended up saving the day there. He came back to Earth and no one believed his adventures. Now he finds himself alone when a spaceship appears in his backyard. A new adventure in space is about to begin. What a great, old-fashioned adventure. Certainly it's a rip-off of the John Carter books and Flash Gordon and probably a ton of others...but it works. It's sublime. The artwork, by Goran Porlov, is awesome stuff. A delightful first issue. ***1/2

VEIL #1: Writer Greg Rucka's newest is an odd one. It's akin to the girl-raised-by-wolves plot but also the popular "amnesia" story. A girl wakes up in the NYC subway surrounded by rats. She has no idea who she is or where she is and she's naked and can barely speak. A young, black dude helps her out a bit but the catch is that she can make people do things against their will. When some thugs show up at this black dude's apartment, the girl makes them shoot and kill each other. Uh...okay. It's strange, sure, but what helps it out is the beautiful, lush, painterly quality of the artwork by Toni Fezjula. I am curious to see where it goes, but so far it's more weird than compelling. *1/2

STRAY BULLETS: KILLERS #1: What a glorious return for David Lapham. If you remember, he wrote and drew forty issues of Stray Bullets and then had to support his family so he left to work for the big companies, doing various work on things like Crossed, Detective Comics, and Deadpool MAX. Well he's back working on his baby, finishing the storyline in Stray Bullets #41 and starting a new series with Stray Bullets: Killers. I admit that I only ever read the first issue of his old run. This new issue is incredibly good, though, and he's apparently lost nothing. This book is weird as hell, very sadistic and very funny. The thing Lapham does best though is get kids right. The way they talk, act, bully. So spot-on. It's a one-in-done story about a boy that follows his father to a strip club. His old babysitter just happens to be a new stripper there and this babysitter's brother is friends with the kid. It just gets more violent from there. Terrific black and white art and a what-the-fuck ending that could provide more answers perhaps but it doesn't matter too much. Awesome stuff. ***1/2

NEW MARVEL BOOKS

Marvel has a new "idea." Their brilliant new idea is that people only like new things...so why not keep the new things coming? The past few months have brought a slew of cancelled titles: Journey to Mystery, Venom, Scarlet Spider, Morbius: The Living Vampire, FF, Cable & X-Force. A few other titles are going back to #1: Wolverine & the X-Men, Daredevil, The Amazing Spider-Man, X-Force. Their idea is that a book numbered in the hundreds is for suckers. Whatever. I still miss those big numbers. Besides returning books back to #1, they're putting out some new books as well (last year they brought out new titles like Nova and Guardians of the Galaxy, this year it's stuff like Magneto, Silver Surfer, Elektra, and New Warriors). So Marvel is trying to push sales higher by all new all the time. Like DC's "new 52" two and a half years ago...this kind of stuff is only good in the short term. What you really need is a good writer/artist and keep them together on the same book for the long haul.

Here's a few reviews of new titles that recently hit:

LOKI: AGENT OF ASGARD #1: Written and drawn by two guys I've never heard of, this one features the adventures of the jerk/teen Loki. The finale has the original, older Loki showing up which I guess is a good thing (remember J. Michael Straczynski had a hot female Loki parading around during his Thor run?). It's simple, okay to look at, fairly forgettable. Eh. * (out of ****)

EMPIRE OF THE DEAD #1: Written by George A. Romero with art by Alex Maleev, this is a zombie tale set in NYC. The catch? There's vampires in it. I hope werewolves aren't far behind...but Romero does a good job here. He's not a bat-shit crazy zombie writer, he builds worlds with real characters and heavy tension and suspense. It's creepy, a bit silly, but feels like one of his films. The stark, dirty dark art by Maleev fits perfectly here. Probably rough being a vampire in a zombie world...or perhaps it's easier. And can you become a zombie vampire? ***

THE PUNISHER #1: I miss the old days when there were multiple monthly Punisher books. These days we're lucky to even have one good one. The last one was the short-lived, critically raven upon Greg Rucka written book...that I didn't care for. We had Jason Aaron's awesome short-lived MAX title. Garth Ennis' bland run was long. And don't get me started on Franken Castle. This new one is pretty basic but it does feature a new locale; L.A. Other than that it's Castle against bad guys. The plot also has a group of secret police that are going after him. The art, by Mitch Gerads, is simple, effective. The script by Nathan Edmondson is paint-by-numbers but it works here. Nothing exceptional, but that's okay. **1/2

WINTER SOLDIER: THE BITTER MARCH #1: Hmmm...instead of cancelling The Winter Soldier title, why didn't they just shoehorn this awesome story into that title's run? Either way, Marvel loves #1's and this is a new mini-series written by Rick Remender and drawn by Roland Boschi. It's more a Nick Fury story, though, since it takes place during the Cold War when Bucky Barnes was the Russian's secret spy/warrior/killing machine known as...the winter soldier. I think Ed Brubaker was the one that made Bucky and the winter soldier the same person, which is ingenious, and so we get to see the "evil" Bucky at work here. The story is great; an evil mansion on a snowy hill-top filled with henchmen, a James Bond-esque opener with fisticuffs on skis. This is pure fun stuff. I could do without Madame Worm (Remender is known for his ridiculousness), but the rest is top notch. ***1/2

SHE HULK #1: Jeez...how long is this book going to last? I know that Marvel cancelled Red She-Hulk last year...and I didn't even know that existed. I thought I was up to date on comic books. Sigh. This new book got great reviews...but probably will sell half as many copies as a Spider-Man book. Charles Soule, the new go-to writer is writing this (he's currently writing Swamp Thing, Thunderbolts, Superman/Wonder Woman, Red Lanterns...and he's a lawyer in NYC). Which is good...because She-Hulk is a lawyer by day (but always with green skin). This book is basically a rip-off of Matt Fraction's , which is a good thing. This means it's light, comedic, and focuses on She-Hulk's daily life instead of her superhero stuff. This first issue was slick, enjoyable, but nothing outrageously good. Javier Pulido's art is cartoony, adequate, pretty. Soule does not have the good sense of humor Fraction has, though, so it feels a bit like a cheap version of Hawkeye. A good start, though. ***

Best Comic Book of 2013: SAGA

For the second year in a row, Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staple's sci-fi/fantasy/romance comic book is the best book of the year. One of the reasons is the fact that it has everything and can't really be labeled. It has emotion, romance, action, humor, comedy, heroes, villains. It's totally bizarre, too. There's a lying cat, royal family members with talking heads, a one-eyed author, a cut-in-half ghost nanny. This book is insane but beautiful, highly entertaining, pretty to look at, funny, engrossing, hard to put down, easy to jump into. This is a masterpiece in the making.

Best Cover: HAWKEYE #8

David Aja is just killing it on the artwork for Hawkeye. There's not much to say about this killer cover except that the point of a good cover is to get your attention. THIS will get your attention. I love everything about this cover: the colors, the frayed edges making it look like an old-school, 70's porn mag, the image that makes you dying to know what's inside. Perfection.

Best Writer of 2013: BRIAN K. VAUGHAN

Saga is, quite basically, Romeo & Juliet in Space, and his "hero", Marko, is, more or less, Yorick from Y: the Last Man. But Vaughan still continuously surprises, excites, and entertains. His whip-smart quips and colorful characters are not all that he's good for; this book has a deep well of emotion running through it. The best scene from Saga was a simple scene when Marko is reminiscing about his now-dead father, remembering when he taught Marko how to fly an alien-creature (you know...like riding a bike). Just a perfectly written sequence.
Besides Saga, Vaughan launched a new book, The Private Eye, that takes place in a future where people wear masks and the internet is dead and gone for good reasons.
Everything Vaughan writes is super entertaining, emotional, humorous, action-packed, visceral, engaging, and fun. Hell, he even writes one of the best letters columns in the business.

Best Artist of 2013: ESAD RIBIC

Jason Aaron writing Thor: God of Thunder probably would have been enough, but my God, the glorious, beautiful, epic art work of Esad Ribic. Panels that look like famous paintings, covers that look just as bad-ass as they do enthralling. The artwork on this book was simply put, legendary.

Best Issue of 2013: AFTERLIFE WITH ARCHIE #1

I suppose you could be sick of zombies by now...but when a zombie book/film/show is done right, it can be insanely creepy and totally entertaining. This issue was both. The reason it was creepy and unsettling in a sense is because Archie and Jughead and Betty and Veronica and the crew from Riverdale are as innocent and carefree as can be. "Let's fuck up their world!" is not really something anyone has probably ever said (unless you're, like, evil). When a zombie outbreak occurs in their world it's not just a gimmick, it's something fresh and new. Writer Roberto Aguire-Sacasa (a play write and Glee writer) does a terrific job at creating a realistic way that a zombie outbreak would happen in this world (how many zombie movies or TV shows or comic books give a reason for the outbreak? NONE!). And the way he writes all of the characters makes it feel like a typical, gee-shucks Archie book except there's a sadistic undercurrent that bubbles up towards the end. The art, by Francesco Francavilla, is super-spooky and perfectly atmospheric. It's such a cool concept that it's almost a shock that it turned out as great as anyone thought it could've-should've-would've been.